I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need

“I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need, if I die by 4 o’clock.”    Henny Youngman

Money.

It’s a miserable topic.

Most therapists avoid talking about it, thinking about it, or dealing with it as if it might actually be a leading cause of death. I suppose an argument could be made that focusing on money alone leads to death of the soul. Or spiritual deadening. Or hardening of the relationship heart. Or deadly boring conversations.

In a survey of therapists that I did several years ago, not a single solitary one said they were in it for the money. The universal responses to the question “What are the top three things you love most about private practice?”  were:

1. The deep pleasure of helping people  through the healing process and watching as they recover happiness, health, and meaningful relationships (variations on that theme)

2. Freedom

3. Ever-expanding professional and personal growth

If money came up at all, among those who felt the need to explain that their worries about having sufficient income did not mean that they were “in it for the money.”

There is a reason why concepts and catch phrases like “Niche to be Rich” and “Wealthy Therapist” fall flat with us.   

Mostly we just don’t care. (Or are reluctant to admit we care.)

Unless we are going broke. 

Then, it matters. A lot.

So before anyone goes broke, let’s get introspective and do a reality check.

I don’t know how to define “enough” or “plenty.” Those definitions lie in the heart, mind, and circumstantial realities of you, the reader. But I do know that worrying how you will pay your office rent or house mortgage creates a different internal experience then knowing you have “plenty” to cover those expenses and are even contributing nicely to your retirement fund. And that internal experience inevitably, if silently, shows up in the difference between the therapist that is clear and 100% present for the client and the therapist that is having to manage what the client is saying along with their own inner anger, fear, sadness, fatigue, and worry.

I do know that not being able to afford your own health insurance when you are eking out a living accepting client’s insurance company defined appropriate revenues creates a different level of comfort then having good comprehensive coverage for yourself and your family. And that internal experience inevitably, if silently, shows up in counter-transference with clients and the issues that can be discussed. 

I do know that not being able to afford a nice vacation when you have to listen to the client whose fees you have discounted for financial hardship is telling you all about their trip to Italy (and can they please pay you next time because they have to get their Beemer fixed) means somebody has money issues. And it isn’t just the client.

If you aren’t making “enough” money to be comfortable….

If you don’t have an income that is “plenty” to cover all of your needs and the majority of your wants….

THEN….maybe it’s time to do a money mindset reality check.

• Do you resent people who have or are making money?

• Do you feel uncomfortable about your fees?

• Do you feel guilty about accepting money to help people solve their problems and end their suffering?

• Do you believe if you give your attention to the financial health of your business that means you don’t care?

• Is your attitude that “marketing” is all about manipulation and taking advantage of people?

• Do you question the value and effectiveness of psychotherapy and your fees reflect that belief?

• Do you believe talking about money with your clients has nothing to do with mental health and is off limits?

 What do you believe about money? Who is it for? What is it for?
Is there ever a reason to focus on it? How is it decided what is “plenty”?

So if you suspect money issues are the underlying reason why you are uncomfortable about actively, intentionally growing your business, then maybe it is time to work them out.

And if you have been able to overcome old, limiting, distorted issues around money, it would be a wonderful thing for you to share HOW you did it. And what you believe now.

We need to support one another in this. It’s a big one and it’s important.

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